Need Your Suggestions Friends. Please Help Me! - Revised and Posted

Hi my dear friends! you all know that I have been served with a notice by this building owner to vacate the place by the month of May 2011. I am yet to find a suitable place for my business.

I am running this Cyber Cafe since 2002 and I have a very strong Client Base. I am going to miss them and vice versa. My customers has already started sharing their disappointment.

It is true that I have been hunting for a place since September last year. And I should admit that the search was a good experience in itself. I found that the commercial building owners has become more greedy these days. The office space that is quarter of the size of my present office cost three times the rent that I pay now. And the size of the space equivalent to the present one is only available for Lease for Lakhs of Rupees, which is not affordable. Real Estate is doing really well, I guess.

I was looking for an office space in an around  T.Nagar. Because there is no other Cyber Cafe within 2 kms radius, that can provide a good service such as mine.There is another Cyber Cafe, which is situated within 1km from my Cafe, but customers still prefer to use my Service. Hence the decision to look in and around this T.Nagar.

There were instances, where I found that the owners demanded us to pay the commission to the brokers, even if we were not referred by the brokers. And there were places, that looked like a go-down, without a proper ventilation and no space to fix my Air conditioner. Some offices didn't have a 3phase electricity connection and the owners either refused to share the cost to set up a 3 phase electricity connection or they didn't let us to set up a 3phase electricity connection. Some commercial complexes don't have the rest room facility. I need one, since I stay in my office from 11.00am to 9.30pm every day. Some business centers don't allow any office to work after 7pm. 

So I started looking for a place in Suburban areas. But still didn't succeed.

I should mention about an interesting incident that happened during the search.I once called a mobile number that I took from an advertisement of Free Ads from the "Commercial Space Available" section. When I called him in the morning, he said that he was watching movie and asked me to call him in the afternoon. I called him again in the afternoon at 3pm. He told me that he was busy and asked me to call after 5pm. I did. When I said that I was looking for a place to set up a Cyber Cafe, he told me that it was a residential area and not sure whether it would serve my purpose.I asked his suggestion. He asked me to come and check for myself. He asked me to come to a place near a car service shop, from where he took me to a building. He was a middle aged man and looked like he was boozing all day. I followed him. That was a multi-storey building, which didn't look well in the ground floor itself. A woman was washing clothes on the way to the entrance of the pathway of the ground floor. There were a group of persons who were sitting and chatting in the adjacent room. The alley was dark. I was expecting him to switch on the light. But he just walked passed the alley and I felt suspicious and stopped near the lady who was washing clothes. This man went inside the dark and disappeared. He came back with a torch light in his hand and switched on the torch light and showed me a space below the staircase. I was confused and irritated. He then said that a screen can be used to get some privacy over there in the corner. I was silently bearing my confused and mixed emotions. I wanted to yell at him. At the same time I laughed at my vulnerable position there.And I was also wondering what made this man to call me and show me a space below the staircase, that can only be used to steal a hug or a smooch by the young inmates of that building. My friend Haseem, accompanied me to that place and we both were laughing out louder, all the way to my Cafe, after we left that building.

Few days back one of my friends suggested me to take a up a job, instead of running around the city to find a place.He also reminded me about the struggle that I had to make to get my Cyber Cafe License renewed last year. If those of you who remember reading those blogs, that I have deleted, after my friends suggested to delete it, would also recommend the same, I guess. It was a nightmare for three days to get the Police to inspect my Cyber Cafe to renew my License.

I know that my business is not doing as good as it used to be three years back. But I thought that I can add more services like networking games to pull the young crowd and adding up an eating joint. This will again demand me to pump in more money apart from my expenses that I will have to bear in shifting and setting up. Since everyone can check mails in their mobile these days, I don't get much browsing customers. I get more business from Typing jobs, Print jobs, Scan jobs and cd writing jobs. And then kids come to play in the playstation. When my friend suggested me this, I was tempted to consider the option.

And many of you, know that I also freelance and I have almost 9 overseas clients. And I keep assisting them throughout the year. So I am thinking to take up this job as well as help my online clients, which will be an added advantage for me.

I am going to preserve my Computer Cabins for future use. I shall gift the computers to my 5yr old niece and other kids, who can use it for their studies. I shall also gift the Playstation to my nephew and niece.

Now, I need your suggestion, my dear friends. What would you suggest? Would you suggest me to take up this job, right now? Or would you want me to continue with my Cyber Cafe business? Please help me to take a decision.

Deep into my heart, I have always wanted to be an entrepreneur. Owner of atleast a small enterprise, if not a big one. I shall wait until I find myself financially sound to start an enterprise again to run it successfully for the rest of my life.


P.S. I have revised this post.

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Why Am I Interested in Men?

There was a new friend request from some one, to my facebook account, who was very curious to know the reason for my interest in Men. LOL.

I only accept friend request from those, who have a profile San those half naked women pics. I also don't add the persons, who doesn't have their photograph in their profile. I term them as COWARDS.  Because they don't have the courage to let the whole world know whoever they are.

This person added me and started chatting with me in my gmail id. The first personal question he asked was,"Why have you mentioned that you are interested in Men in your FB profile?". I just couldn't help myself laughing at him.

The two options that are available in Facebook are "Men" and "Women" in the 'Interested' section of the Profile under the "Basic Information tab". I thought selecting "Women" would term me as a lesbian. Because I have quite a few Gay friends in my Friend's list. And I also thought that would make people to think that I am a trans-gender, because I had a very close trans-gender friend in my FB friends list.

But the main reason for having not chosen is that - My experience with women (Indian Women) friends has taught me to not to believe them. Because they don't dare to open their true selves to the society. Instead they prefer to live by hiding their true self and pretend to be whatever they are not, throughout their life, living their life for others and not for themselves.

Are Men true to themselves? Nope, they are not. But I chose this option, because I found that they stand up to their belief SOMETIMES, if not often. Atleast they don't crucify others who have different beliefs and faiths, in the name of sanctity.  And yes, Its always fun with the friends of opposite sex. I am sure every female would love that, except the ones who would prefer to confine themselves within their cocoon of FAMILY. And I can bet, women could learn to lead their life more easily, in the company of men. Vice versa. Are you both listening to me?                                                  

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Pigs & Piglets Populate The Earth

I had little pain in my lower abdomen and went to a gynecologist for a consultation. She was an elderly person and was well poised.

She asked me,"What is your age, Uma?"
I said,"I am 42years old, Mam."
She asked me,"How many kids do you have?"
I said,"Zero" and smiled at her.
She looked at me surprisingly and said,"Why not?"
I said,"We guys don't have a good understanding between us, so I have decided to not to have kids."
She said,"Intelligent people like you make wise decisions."
And she added after a pause,"But the families that neither have a good financial stability nor good understanding between the partners are breeding like pigs and the world is thickly populated with that type of pigs and piglets". That comment should have made me to ponder over her words. Instead I just laughed at her comment.

It was the "Festival of Harvest" here and a National Holiday. People had made it a custom to throng the beach to just to play with the waves and gulp those snacks prepared in an unhygienic environment, in that particular day. I worked on that day, since I had some pending works to be completed. The regular Bus that I used to get was little late that day and I guessed the reason for it. I got into the bus and to my surprise, the Bus was so crowded with little ones with dirty clothes, that I hardly found a place to stand. I didn't expect this crowd to board the last bus of that day. Their mothers were calling names to see that their kids don't fall asleep. The kids were very tired and were feeling drowsy. It was 10.15pm. I could see the kids were irritated and so was their parents. I suddenly realized how true are the Doctor's words.

A girl, who would barely be 25 or 26 was pregnant. She was carrying a kid on her shoulder. She also saw that another kid who was standing next to her was safe.I am sure that these children will not be getting good care at home,where the first lesson of life is learnt. They will not be brought up in a good manner by their parents because their parents will be more worried about feeding them than to educate them about other things in life. The land is being populated by the pigs and the piglets. Imagine the future of Earth.

I was looking for the educated public that I travel along with, everyday and alas! I found them in a state of shock, just like me.

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Children of God

People in Chennai knows about the size of the seats in an "express" bus. It is called as "luxury bus" and commuters are charged more for the sake of the name. In fact the luxury bus is very less comfortable than the other ordinary buses. There is very less leg space between the row of seats. Standing passengers has to jump up to catch hold of the overhead rod to balance themselves when a sudden brake is applied. The double seats that are meant for two people to sit is so small, that both the seated passengers has to squeeze themselves.The other night, while I was returning home I happened to sit near a middle aged woman. She was talking about "Christ" and the "children of god" to the other woman who was sitting at the back seat.  She was gossiping about the other persons who were working in the Christian Organization. She said,"they claim that they are children of god, but they don't live up to their words". I waited for ten minutes, she was sitting in the same position and left very little space for me to sit. I lost patience and requested the lady to move a bit. She looked at me angrily and said,"There is no space to move" and said,"This is all the space I can leave for you". She was still turning back and was occupying three fourth of the seat. I wondered whether she was one of the "children of god".

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Words of Wisdom & Encouragement - Patrick Schwerdtfeger turns 40

Am really proud of my client Patrick Schwerdtfeger. And am happy that I was associated with him when he started his career as a Speaker. I learnt about Social Media Marketing from him. Wishing you a very happy Birthday Patrick.

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Some one has to be shot to learn lessons

Yesterday night, at 9.30pm, while I was waiting for the city bus in the bus stop, a police woman appeared from nowhere and started shouting and shooing us to get into the bus shelter from the road. She started shooing the public as though she would shoo away the cattle. The bus stop was crowded and inspite of that we got into the bus shelter and it was overflowing. She wasn't satisfied and started saying, "move, move, move". This is the scene that happens in our country whenever a politician or a VIP passes the route. The buses and the vehicles are not allowed to ply on the route.We always get treated like slaves and no one bothers to question this kind of treatment meted out to us, including myself. An old man, gathered some courage and told her that there is no enough space inside the shelter for such a big crowd. She was not convinced. She pointed towards her temple and said, "seriously speaking, none of you have anything here". An old cyclist was asked to get down and walk on the road. But the cyclist didn't care to obey her order and rode away as slowly as he could. She just couldn't stand this act of his. She said,"some one has to be shot and killed, only then you people will learn lessons". Frankly speaking I don't know whether she meant the politician that crossed that route or the people who were waiting for the bus as "some one". A person got a call and he tried to attend his mobile phone. She shouted,"Hey, put your mobile in your pocket. Don't get down. You Bull". That was an unwarranted comment.

She was so young that she could only be a police trainee, but was acting like a rowdy. I wonder what would happen to us, if she becomes a senior police person some day and forget to differentiate between harmless citizens and terrorists. Long live Indian Democracy.


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The school bus was missing

My 5 year old niece, Shruthi, used to travel by the school bus every day. And there were days when the school bus arrived late to the bus stop in the morning to pick her up as well as late in the evening to drop her back. My sister was, once so panicked that she made umpteen number of calls to the school to find out the reason for the delay and all they could answer was the School Bus left the school on time.She had the mobile number of the School Bus driver. She called him thrice, but her calls were not picked up. She didn't want to make more calls to the driver's mobile, because she thought that would distract him, if he was driving the vehicle.

There could be many reason for this delay such as:

An unexpected traffic diversion from the usual route.
The sudden increase in the traffic because of a traffic diversion in another Route.
A snag in the Bus.
Bus met with an accident.
The class was dispersed late.
The Bus Driver had to take a sick student to the hospital etc.,

A solution should be found to inform the concerned authorities as well as the parents about the delay or even about the whereabouts of the bus. There should be a tracking system, by which both the school and the parents are informed about the arrival,departure and the place where the bus is traveling. 

I told this to a friend and he showed me a tool kit. I found this tool kit very useful. This kit helps parents and schools to enjoy a convenient, collaborative and optimized school transportation system.

For Parents, the "Real-time School bus position SMS", provides anxiety-free, convenient option and enhances the trust on school and value the school's drive for excellence.

The tracking features and fleet management tools provide the schools with an opportunity to optimize routes reduce operational cost and improve the School bus safety Manifolds.

Schools should use this toolkit and increase the safety of the students as well as reduce the anxiety of the parents.

I have written more on the tool kit here. Write to me, if you want to know more about this kit. I would be happy to share more information on this kit. Happy Parenting.

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Uma
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The Toolkit that enhances the life of all parents

For Parents, this kit provides anxiety-free, convenient option and enhances the trust on school and value the school's drive for excellence.

The emergency assist and pro-active alerts enables the school authorities to take pro-active actions as situation demands. This kit provides a more interactive platform between the school and parents to share News, Information, Documents, and Grievances etc. This platform defines a synergised bond between the school and parents, thereby accentuating the schools strive for excellence to new heights.

In recent times we hear lot of cases of rash driving by the driver of the school buses.Installing this kit will keep the authorities informed about the driving habits of the driver.

There are instances that the Bus has to wait for a longer time in the bus stops, because the kids come late to the bus stop. This could be informed to the parents of those kids, who waits for the bus in the consequent stops and avoid anxiety and confusion.

The features include:
Real time tracking of the moving vehicle
Real time position SMS alerts to parents
Safety Measure for the Vehicle
Emergency assist option

Write to me, if you want to know more about this kit. I would be happy to share more information on this kit. Happy Parenting.

Read more here

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Coins Coincide

I just discovered that a customer has paid me in cents instead of rupees.

Take a look at both the coins. 

Isn't that interesting? Do you think that the government should do something to differentiate the coins?

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Uma
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You Are Not Alone!

The only man I will love forever!

Please Don't Keep Me Waiting

I need you more than any body else
                 Please don't keep me waiting
I have many dreams for us to realise
                 Please don't keep me waiting
Take me into your arms as soon as possible
                 Please don't keep me waiting
I want to feel your warmth and kiss on your chest
                 Please don't keep me waiting
I long for you whenever i see a happy couple
                 Please don't keep me waiting
Every day that passes without a message from you, makes my heart ache
                 Please don't keep me waiting
Every night that passes without your presence leaves me dejected
                 Please don't keep me waiting
We do have many differences of opinion, we can still be together
                 Please don't keep me waiting
I want to cry in your arms and just cant hold back any more
                  Please don't keep me waiting
I am feeling unwanted, can't take any more
                  Please don't keep me waiting
Every man i see looks like you, have i gone insane
                  Please don't keep me waiting
I still remain hungry for your love, show mercy on me
                  Please don't keep me waiting
I feel like waiting for my death at the deathbed, its been four years now
                  Please don't keep me waiting, any more.

Lest, you lose me or we both, each other

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Uma
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Ah! for the sake of sex!

Kamu was courting his wife for 3 years, before marriage. They have got a cute little baby boy who celebrated his first birthday last month. There were many instances when Kamu used to lament about his bad decision of marriage - so called LOVE MARRIAGE after loving the person for 3 years.

John's was an arranged one. He has a daughter who is 4 and a half years old. Married for 5 years. He cried on my shoulder for having got married.

So did Sankar, Madhu, Ganesh and the list go on.

Is marriage a necessity? Why do we think that people who love each other should get married? Why should we marry at all? Why should we even think about marrying a person about whom we don't know anything except their physical appearance, which would fade away after a few years? If you are an Indian from a very conservative family, you will understand how things work at home as far as marriage is concerned.

Do you think that marriage will save people from AIDS, STD etc? This is what my elders say about marriage. When a man has sex with just one woman, throughout his lifetime, then he can be saved from sexual diseases.

Would we have less number of single parents if people get married? No. I have seen many divorcees and legally separated single parents.

Why would people who got divorced for the first time, think about marrying again? Sex - YESSSS!

Is it sex that drives the singles to think about marrying, even a stranger? Do they think that there would always be one in the reserve on the bed whenever they want it? I think sex plays a major role in any marriage. I know many of my friends who thought that they would have a blast on bed, whenever they wanted to, if they get married. But later they actually had to work hard to achieve their goals at home or outside.

I want the married as well as singles to post their comments in favour of their views.

Come on guys, I know that you are all struggling out there in the field. Use this chance to vent your feelings. lol.


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I Felt Romantic Looking at the The Silver Disc

The silver disc with all its shininess around it in the dark sky was looking so beautiful that I felt grateful to have got a pair of eyes. The semi-dark open terrace above the two floors of that building gave me a sense of relief from the four walls of my office. It was wonderful to watch the waves rushing back and forth carrying the moon’s reflection. The reflection pulled me to go near to the beach to cherish the natural beauty and wet my feet. I saw little crabs crawling hurriedly back to the water after being washed ashore by the waves. 

It was fun to watch the huge waves hitting my legs and running back to join the next wave that is rushing to touch my feet. It was jolly good to hold hands to support each other to avoid the fall when strong waves caught us unaware while we were watching the crabs. The crabs looked like tiny stars swimming in the sands. 

We shared adult jokes, shared funny things that happened in our life, discussed life and many things that matter. The ride back home was romantic with my friend. I was very much comfortable with him, this being the first time he took me out. 

I love riding fast on a bike and I asked my friend to go faster so that I can enjoy the breeze hitting my face and my body. Thanks to my friend who took me for a long bike ride to my favourite spot on the long beach bordering my City. That was a great relief after a week’s hard work. Hope you guys had a great weekend too. See you all soon with a new story.

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I Needed You, But .....

Darling, do you remember our last Valentines Day celebration in the year 2004? You surprised me by sending me a flower bouquet full of roses and lilies tied neatly with a golden color band attached with a note written in blue colour, my favourite colour, "I LOVE YOU". We met in the evening after our work and went to beach. You carried me down to the water and put me down to feel the cool water touching my heals and rushing back. We played on the sands building castles.You weren't bothered about others watching us playing with the water. But i was. I needed you to be here with me to celebrate this year's Valentines Day as well as those years that has passed. But you weren't here with me. :(

The other day i was waiting for the bus in the night to go back to home. I found myself standing alone in the bus stop. Saw a shabby man, who was approaching me. I started walking along the road, trying to walk away from him. The faster my pace, the faster was his too. I started running in the darkness. I could hear him running behind me, chasing me all the way on the road. I was shocked to see that the man caught hold of me and i turned around to see his face. I couldn't recognize him. Because it was dark and i was lying on my bed trying to figure out the things in my room in the darkness. I needed you to hold me and sleep that night. But you were not there with me. :(

The other day I was running among a crowd in a chaos. Everyone was running past me, as though something wild is chasing them. I was trying my best to run faster, but i couldn't. My legs didn't budge, in spite of my every effort to pull them to move every step ahead. Tears ran down my cheeks exposing my helplessness. I woke up to find my pillow wet. I needed you to hold me and console me. But you weren't there with me.

Two nights back my mom was about to sit on my brother's bike. My brother started the bike and moved on, thinking that my mom has sat behind. Later my mom called him to say that she is yet to sit behind. He waited for my mom. My mom walked towards the bike and tried to sit. My brother did the same again. This time mom was tired and stood still. Suddenly the bike broke into two pieces, each pieces running on one wheel. The frontal fuel tank portion was running ahead with my nephew seated on his front small seat. The back portion was running behind the front one, my brother seated on the it. We were all shocked to see my mom hit by a vehicle, which i couldn't remember, and lying motionless on the road. I ran towards my mom, picked her up and was shocked to see her lying unconscious.I shook her violently calling out for help. She started breathing and opened her eyes. It was so dark that i had to blink my eyes many times to realize that i was lying on the bed and tears running down my cheeks. I needed you to hug me tight to calm me down. But you weren't there with me.


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New Year Resolution - I Will Try To Love You All

We make resolutions every year or every month or even every week.The resolutions vary from starting the day with a work out in a gym to not to use dirty words in our daily chat with our friends. And we find ourselves following the resolution strictly for few days. And then we return to our normal routine of waking up late, ofcourse citing silly reasons like,oh!i got up late today;am feeling tired today, will go tomorrow for sure; i went to bed late, so let me sleep for few more minutes etc etc.

I used to make resolutions every day :)

Time to talk about my last year resolution. I made a resolution to help others as much as i can and not to make faces at others even if provoked. Alas, i broke my resolution everyday. And should i blame others for having provoked me to loose my temper? Should i find fault at others who made me to turn a blind eye to the needy?

I didn't work yesterday and stayed back at home due to severe headache. And that was a good chance for me to view the Solar Eclipse as well as search for my real self - self realization. I was trying to think about the instances that i was provoked and the instances when i failed to help others. I looked at my mom, a retired government employee, the sole inspiration in my life all these days. She was lying next to me and was reading the newspaper. She is a brave and humble woman. If i have to write about my mom and her bravery, then i will end up writing an interesting book for you all to read. And am very sure that it would leave a lasting impression in everyone's life, whoever reads the book.And am planning to write about her too, provided i get enough time to write.

She was ill-treated almost all her life time and never has she shown the hatred. All she did was to swallow all the insults and did her duties without fail - as a wife as well as a mother. She never looses a chance to help others. Infact she goes out of her way to help the needy persons. Now that she is growing old, i guess she has lost her hearing in one ear or both the ears. I have to raise my voice at times, when i speak to her. That irritates me sometimes. Yesterday night when she woke up, i was watching the TV and my brother was sitting in the drawing room working on the computer. She looked at my brother's empty bed and asked me the whereabouts of my brother. I said, " he is in the drawing room". She didn't hear properly i guess. She asked me again. I repeated the same. She asked me the same question again. I was so irritated that i yelled at her saying,"Please keep quiet and go to sleep mom". She said, "I asked the question because his bed is empty". She said that calmly and went back to sleep.

I have watched my mom repeating one story again and again to my niece who is four and a half years old, every night. My niece will never be tired of hearing the same story every night and so do my mom, repeating it every night. I made a resolution that i am going to be polite to my mom and i should forgive others even when they ill-treat me. I am going to try to emulate my mom. She used to say," Every soul that comes to me, is my responsibility and i need to show the correct path to them to lead a good life". I only pray that almighty gives me all the strength to be as humble as my mom.

In continuation of this, i would like to let all my friends know, present as well as past, to be my friends forever. I am willing to accept those friends to whom i have shut the door of friendship. So please do come to me again and let us to try help each other to lead a better life.

I also request my other friends,who have chosen to be away from me, to forgive me, if i have hurt you by any means. Please do come and join me in the journey of life. Let us try to be friends again and try to not to hurt others. Let us try to forgive others. Let us try to be humble persons.

I would like to quote a writing on one of my friend's wall in facebook:Joseph Ranseth's: "Letting go of our expectations about how things (or other people) should be in our life is the end of suffering". I totally agree with this. Don't you think the same too?

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Is Sex Love?

My friend Desmond told me that his boy friend is so possessive that he doesn't want Desmond to maintain a close friendship with other guys.Desmond also told me that his boy friend loves him so much and he is happy about it.

I asked Desmond,"Do you really think that he loves you?". Desmond said,"i am proud of his love for me".

I said,"If he really loves you, then why couldn't he stand seeing yourself happy with your friends?". Desmond blinked at me. I said,"Your boy friend doesn't trust you. He actually feels insecure and jealous of you" Desmond looked at me angrily.



I said,"If he really loves you, then why wouldn't he let you have close friends? He is jealous of your happiness. He just couldn't stand seeing yourself happy with other guys. He couldn't stand seeing you laughing with your friends. He couldn't stand seeing you spending time with your friends. It is not love. It is jealousy. He wants you to be happy only with him. He wants you to spend time only with him.Now tell me, is this what you call as 'Love'?"

Desmond thought that i was right and he wanted to discuss this with his boyfriend.

Hey guys, do you think that i have poisoned his mind? Do you think that i was wrong?

Everyone of us have different opinions on different issues. I invite you guys to share your thought about this.

My friend Jayan told me that he would let his girl friend to sleep with other guys, but would want her to return back to him at the end of the day to be in his arms. Does that mean Jayan doesn't love his girl friend?

A married couple doesn't mind swapping their partners for a day or two with their best friends.Is it because they do not love each other?

One of my friend's wife knows that her husband is sleeping with other woman and she is okay with him as long as he care for her and for the family. Should we say that she doesn't love her husband?

My friend Johnson get a call from his wife every half an hour to ask him his whereabouts and whatever he is doing. And every time Johnson tell lies to her saying that he is held up at work. He doesn't want to hurt his wife by saying that he was visiting one of his female friend. Do you think that his wife loves him?




One of my female friend knew that her husband has an extra marital affair and she just couldn't stand this. This friend of mine is so fat that her husband doesn't enjoy sleeping with her. She knew that, that is the reason for him to stray. But she wouldn't let him spend his time in peace. What is the feeling that she has for her husband?. Love? Jealousy? Possessiveness? Insecurity?

Would you hate your baby if the baby laughs and feels happy in your neighbour's arms? Won't you let your child to play with their best friends? Won't you let your best friends to spend time with your other friends? Would you refuse to love your child, when the child says that he wants to be left alone for few days? Is the love that you have for your partner is different from the love you have for your siblings and parents?

We have always been told that true love is to have one partner for life. This has many reasons behind. If one partner for life is maintained, then there wouldn't be the problem of time sharing, commitment and other health related issues. But how would you prove your true love for someone? Being possessive?

Can "Sex" be related to "Love"? Can you measure somebody's love with "Sex"? If you find your partner seeing somebody regularly, would you mind it? If yes, then why?

Is it because you don't want your partner to have another person in his/ her arms? Is it because you don't want your partner to be cheered up by another person? Don't you want your partner to get something that he is missing from your existing relationship with him? Would you argue that your partner has to bear you for all your shortcomings in the name of "LOVE"?. Would you expect your partner to sacrifice the special feelings and urges,in the name of "LOVE"?.

Why should everybody think that having sex outside of marriage or outside of the so called RELATIONSHIP, is not acceptable?

Can anybody, who has a valid and meaningful answer can enlighten me on this please?



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I Love You My Friends

Heartfelt thanks goes to all of you for your blessings and wishes. I love you all.

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I Have A Crush On You

Hey handsome, hope you are doing well. Do you remember our last meeting? You were sitting next to me and sharing your dreams with me. I was listening to you calmly. You,later wondered whether i fell asleep with my eyes wide open. lol.



I was admiring your calmness and the hope you have in your life, after the serious mishap, as well as a breakup you had with your girl friend. I was admiring the dreams in your eyes and hope in your words, while you were building your dream castle, sitting next to me relaxingly. I was admiring the batting of your eyelids while you were sharing your dreams with me. I was admiring the movements of your hands weaving your dream castle on the air. I was admiring the fast and eager movements of your dreamy eyes when you were explaining the arrangement of things all over your dream home. I was admiring your square shoulders trying to reach out to the trees in your dream garden. I was admiring your fingers and the neatly cut nails while you were attending the call that intruded in your dreamy interlude.



I was holding myself from touching your hairy forearms and playing with the hairs. I was holding myself from feeling your lips, that were struggling to stay together while you were sharing your dreams with me. I was admiring your gym toned strong thighs that was resting on the chair and your leg that was stretched out on a stool. I was holding myself from reaching out to your thighs and resting my head on it. I was holding myself from leaning on those strong shoulders. I was holding myself from taking your fingers and admiring your rosy nails. I was holding myself from reaching out to your hands and taking the wide palms to my cheeks. I held my breath when i saw the hairs on your chest while you bent down to pick up the bike's key that you dropped. My heart skipped a beat and i forgot to take the air into my lungs when you came near to me, to pick up your helmet from the next seat of mine. My eyes didn't blink while i watched you walking towards your bike after bidding bye to me. I was holding myself from running behind you and hugging your rectangular shaped upper body. Your smell still lingers around me and in my thoughts.

I know that i am going to have long nights. And its definitely going to take many nights to get back my lost peace as well as my sleep.


Burning in desire
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Why Do Men And Women Stray?

I was 14years old when i heard that one of my Uncle was seeing another woman, while my aunt was away in her college, doing her final year Bachelor Degree in Medicine & Surgery. I thought that my Uncle has committed a sin. And I even thought that my Aunt will not let him to stay with her if she comes to know about his illicit affair. Later, i learnt that my Aunt has accepted his act of adultery terming it as "social menace". Few years later,while i was 18years old, i came to know that my Aunt was attracted towards her colleagues at work.And this time i was matured enough, to accept this act of infidelity as "normal" and not "social menace".

I think Men and Women stray for many reasons.

The first and foremost is the unfulfilled physical needs. I guess Men look at that part of the relationship as the foremost thing in their partners. Is there anybody who can refute this claim?


You can't, because men are made so. Purely because of the amount of testosterone, the sex harmone,in their body. Women have a much smaller amount of testosterone in their bodies compared to men. So, this is something to do with Science, over which no one has control. I remember that i read somewhere Men has ten times more than the testosterone of women. That explains why we find more straying men than women. And last comes the financial and emotional support.

And I guess women stray, firstly, due to the lack of emotional and financial support from their spouses. Lastly, to compensate for the sexual inadequacies in their existing relationship.

I invite you guys to share your thoughts about Straying Men & Women.

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Is Commitment Love?

When my friend said that he is committed to his wife,i asked him the meaning of his sentence. He said that he cant accommodate anybody else in his life other than his wife.

I said, "Do you mean to say that you can't love anybody else other than your wife?". He was quiet for a long time. I even forgot the question that i put to him half an hour earlier.


He asked me, "Why are you confusing Love with Commitment?". I looked at him questioningly. He said, "Love and Commitment are different. It is not necessary that I should love the person whom I am committed to". I was even more puzzled.

He said, "Commitment is fulfilling my responsibilities irrespective of the love I have for them. Loving is that 'extra touch', that i give them when they are in need of me."


I said," It is NOT possible. You cant do justice to LOVE and COMMITMENT by that way. You might get a call from the LOVE as well as COMMITMENT, at the same time. Which one would you choose?. You could only be with either your LOVE or COMMITMENT. So, COMMITMENT will win and LOVE will have to sacrifice. Don't you agree with me?"

I hope you guys will agree with me.

Have a rocking weekend either with your LOVE or COMMITMENT. :)


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May Her Soul Rest In Peace

I suddenly remembered this beautiful actress. She has shown her acting prowess in many popular films. Few of them are "Pakeezah", "Sahib Bibi Aur Ghulam", "Baiju Bawra" etc. There was also another actress for whom i cried for, when i heard the news that her body was found 2 days after her death in her flat. She was living alone.Some of the most memorable films of her were "Arth", "Lamhe".

Both the women should have been blessed with good souls to take everyone under their wings when they were approached. Whether they benefited from their relationships or not, can be answered only by the people who were associated with them.

Woh sab ki ti, uske liye koi nahi ta – This was the last sentence of a program, which was about one of this yesteryear actresses. The presenter who was presenting this program for the listeners, played great songs and narrated the good as well as bad moments of this beautiful actress’s life. This program was broadcast by the national radio station in 1992.

I was too young to understand the last sentence of the program. How could a woman be available to everyone and then find herself all alone at the fag end of her life?

The word “AVAILABLE” has many meanings, I guess. A woman could have been available to someone who were in need of a mother. A woman could have also been available to someone who were in need of a sister. A woman could have been available to someone who were in need of a daughter. She could have also been available to few who were in need of a Girl Friend. She could have also been available to few who were in need of a wife.

I guess everybody played their own part when they got her by their side. If that’s the case then why was she left alone when she badly needed a person by her side? There wasn't a brother, a father, a son, a husband and a lover by her side to tend to her. Does that mean that the father, brother, husband and the lover didn’t need her anymore? Or did they find the woman unfit to be enacted in any of her roles in her real life? Was she so bad that no character liked this woman in the play of life?

I am puzzled and worried. Life is too complicated to all the persons who choose to lead a life of liberation. What could be the reason behind this sorry state of affairs? Is the society not matured enough to understand and support them? Does the society feel that they are a nuisance to their community? Or is it afraid of the younger generation going wayward, if they support them, though they secretly do?

I guess their souls are not resting in peace. And it is wandering to find out the truth. All i pray to almighty is "MAY THEIR SOUL REST IN PEACE".


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One Of My Wishlist Fulfilled

Yup, it was fulfilled last weekend. Thanks goes to Sridhar, my friend, who took me for a real looooooooong ride on a weekend. The traffic was almost nill as we were crossing the IT park beyond shollinganallur. So it was a fast ride. And i enjoyed tucking myself between the fast wind and my friend.I closed my eyes and felt the cool wind on my face, in that dark night.I wanted to leave both my hands free, stretch them to my sides and feel like flying. But i wasn't able to do it. Because i chose the wrong dress for the ride. I should have chosen a pant and a shirt for this long ride. I wore a salwar kameez and a dupatta, which needed my attention now and then, playing a spoil sport.

Only when we thought that we can raise the speed, we suddenly felt that the road was missing and it was so dark that we were not able to see anything ahead.We were thrilled and confused for few seconds searching for the missing road.:) We realised that there was a sharp turn. We took the turn and found ourself on a bridge. And the water was flowing under the bridge.We both don't know to swim.

It started raining after a while. This is what i was looking for. A jolly ride in the rain, in a cool night! Who wouldn' enjoy it?. My friend was also enjoying the drizzle with me. The feel of cool water running down my body and the feel of cool wind brushing the wet body was wonderful.

Thank you Sridhar.

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Bihar and the Swayamvar - Maa Tujhe Salam

Bihar faces this flood situation every year. People face hardships due to this flood. And i find that neither the people are strong enough to ask questions to our national leaders about the pathetic condition of the state nor the so called voter's choices are making any meaningful effort to avoid this type of situation in future.



Tue, Aug 4 09:43 AM
I have reproduced the following from the yahoo news link:http://in.news.yahoo.com/43/20090804/914/ten-rakhi-sawant-says-she-won-t-invite-m.html

'I was all set to marry Elesh on Sunday. But it was Elesh who said he wanted more time to get to know me. I'm very confident of him. But if he needs more time to get to know me, how can I force myself on him? I'm ready to wait as long as he wants,' said Rakhi.

I am sure the people who are here in this photos are not watching this tamasha on TV. If they had watched the show, then they would have cursed the bride and the bridegroom, instead of blessing them.



Jai Hind. Hamara Bharat Mahan. Maa Tujhe Salam.






Though i didn't view a single episode of this TV Swayamvar - choosing a life partner from the contestants. It does sounds exciting as well as weird.

Interestingly Elesh has asked for more time to get to know Rakhi. I appreciate his intelligent move of asking for more time to get to know her. What would happen if Elesh finds Rakhi,not suitable for him after a certain point of time? What would she do, if he wants to conduct another Swayamvar, asking Rakhi to join his girl friend contestants? We shall get to know a person only if we spend every moment with him or her ,at home as well as outside with our friends.

Men and Women who has settled for love marriage after knowing their partners for many years are a divorced lot now. Men and Women who has listened to their parents' and married their parent's choices are not happy too. Now Rakhi and Elesh would be a laughing stock if they are going to get separated legally or not. Who has gained from this tamasha? The T.V. channel? Rakhi? Elesh? What has the viewers gained?

What are we doing to the future generation? Are we making a better place for them? Are we setting a good trend to live life peacefully and meaningfully? Where is the nation heading on to? I don't know whether the people who has lost their home, assets and family members in Bihar floods viewed this Tamasha. How much has the sponsors and the TV Channel spent on Rakhi as well as on this show? Who has benefited from this show? The nation? The people who are suffering without food in Bihar floods? CRY? Any other charity organization?


I have reproduced this new from the yahoo link : http://in.biz.yahoo.com/090806/50/bau0bj.html:
Friday August 7, 11:16 AM
"First-quarter job losses touch 1.71 lakh"

Unemployment estimates for the first quarter of the financial year show a total of 1.71 lakh job losses, and the spectre loomed over most sectors, according to a study by the Labour Bureau. Buttressing this is data that shows withdrawal requests from the Employees' Provident Fund Organisation (EPFO) between April and June touching a record 31.51 lakh, indicating large-scale layoffs as well as a severe cash crunch among workers.

Are we worried about this?

Can anybody enlighten me on this please? I am disturbed by the way things are being taken and conducted.

Angered and Worried :(
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Have i gone insane or the people around me?

26/12/08:

Yesterday night while I was walking to the bus stop from work, I came across people who were talking to themselves. That really worried me.

There was this man, who was talking about the nature, wind and eyes. I heard him saying that he could see the whole world through his eyes. And he was thanking god that he could see the nature through his eyes. He was keeping on repeating this. I just turned back to see the person. He was sitting alone and was talking to himself loudly. One of the his eye was bandaged. And only then I realized that he was just venting his feelings out. He should have experienced more pain in his heart about the lose of vision in one of his eye. He stood up after few minutes, faced the small crowd which was scattered there in the bus stop, it was almost 10pm, and asked them “Why do you cry when you watch sad scenes in a movie?” Everyone was just watching him. Perhaps everyone was tired at the end of the day after their work. Or there was not a single young soul who could respond to this battered soul.

My bus reached my bus stop and I got into the bus. Fortunately I got a seat to sit. I heard a woman, who was sitting behind me, scolding a man. She was murmuring dirty words. The woman didn’t stop scolding him even after 10minutes. I turned to see whether she was talking to someone over mobile phone. She wasn’t holding one. She turned her head towards the window and was talking to herself angrily. She was a middle aged woman, very disturbed inside. She was looking very normal outside, just like the man in the bus stop.

I feel the whole world is turning insane. Everyone is feeling lonely. I guess, not everyone find someone to confide in, without fearing that it could catapult on them. That shows that everyone of us have stopped trusting anyone. Is it because we are more self centered, selfish?. Are we so engrossed with our own life, that we don't find time to lend our shoulder to our near and dear ones and leave them talk to themselves or talk to the strange crowd at late night?

Gone are those days, when ppl go to temple, sit calmly, close their eyes and pour all their feelings there and return home with lighter heart. Now we don’t have faith in anything. Not even God. Do we?

I have reproduced it from my old file. There is no difference in the world i look today, August 6,2009.

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Removed the blog on my friends' suggestion

Shankar is a friend of mine with whom i used to hang out on weekends. He called me few minutes back and suggested me to remove the blog "Money Does Matters To Cops 1 & 2" stating that i am entering into danger zones. And that i do not have any evidence to prove that they demanded money. Only a fool would accept that he is a thief and he would commit a burglary in front of the camera. I am giving you an extract of our chat in yahoo messenger.
sankar: money does matter to cops type this in google
sankar: and see it to yourself
Uma: let it come
Uma: i don mind
Uma: every single citizen in india knows this
Uma: i didn't write/ reveal any secret
Uma: did i?
sankar: you are entering a dangerous zone
sankar: making an allegation for which u dont have single
sankar: proof to say
sankar: you can be booked under cpc
sankar: mind it... u donna their powers
sankar: on corruption
sankar: especially allegation against them
Uma: okay
Uma: but i am not going to remove
sankar: ok.... god bless you..
Uma: let me face this for every single citizen who is harassed

The other friend Nanda, who is working with an IT company, lives in Bangalore. He suggested me to remove the status in my yahoo messenger chat id. The status was the same which i had in Myspace, Hi5,Twitter,Google chat. And the status was "Looks like am going to bribe the cop today to get my license renewed". Here is the extract of our chat:
nanda : Bribing is a crime.......and advertising or publicizing this........might attract unwanted and unfavorable attention
Uma : let it be
Uma: am frustrated
Uma : and intimidated
nanda : frustrated and intimidated
nanda : hey common....you are in india
nanda : even judges these days are intimidated by ministers
Uma : very good
Uma : let us not praise the nation
Uma : then
nanda : oh thats your opinion my dear
nanda: better pay....500..... think its beer money
nanda: or you had a cocktail at le meridien
nanda: see pisase....me have been on the right side of law and procedures for so many years....hence not made my millions yet
nanda: if you are stuck......first start swimming....
nanda: once you find dry land....then u can take them to task
Uma: this is the first time am facing this kinda situation
nanda: lol..........mom served as a senior gazetted official for 27 years....
nanda: but was asked bribed to get her retirement papers
nanda: after i paid the man... i told him... we were from the media and the conversation is recorded
nanda: any day you are happy me will have the authorities swoop down on you.....
nanda: he must think and live in fear atleast some days in his life
nanda: read somewhere.......TALENT IS SOMETHING BUT
nanda: TACT IS EVERYTHING
Uma: jus wanted you to agree that the system is not so green
nanda: be safe and take care

There is another friend Ravi, who lives in Bangalore. He has a story to say about the builder who has bribed the authorities, to not to take the case of Ravi. Ravi lost his Dadinlaw in an elevator accident. That was his new house. Dadinlaw was there for the first time to visit the new house. The elevator door opened when there was no cabin in the floor. Poor old man stepped inside and fell down from the fourth floor. He was pronounced dead when he was taken to the hospital. And to remind you, that was a newly constructed building and the Elevator was a new one. That was a working day. Both Ravi and Mrs. Ravi were at work. Ravi's mominlaw was at her house. The family has lost a member and now they are made to run from pillar to post to get justice.

Ravi also suggested me to remove the Blog post saying that this might delay the process of issuing the license.This would hinder my business too.

A friend, James, also suggested me to remove the blog saying that i am living in India and not in the other part of the earth.

Hence i have decided to remove the two blog posts. But i just want to say that they are not friends of people, as they project themselves.


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Hugging and Kissing Is Banned

I was also surprised when my niece, Shruti, a four and half year old, told me that hugging and kissing is banned at home. She revealed this to me when she was at my home last weekend. That was a sunny Sunday afternoon. So we stayed indoors and was having fun playing with my niece. Once i called her near me. She came near me and was staring at my eyes. I said, "Give me a hug darling". She came near and hugged me reluctantly. My sister was watching this. Shruti said,"Hugging and kissing is banned at home. So don't hug and kiss me". I looked at my sister questioningly. She said,"Yes i have told my daughter to not to allow anybody, at school or at any place, to hug and kiss her". My sister has even advised her husband to not to hug and kiss Shruti.

Hugging gives us all the wanted solace, when we are down. Hugging gives us all the courage, when we doubt our own capabilities. Hugging gives us a feel of security when we feel insecure. We hug someone to show that we care for them. Last weekend I was watching the movie "Seven Years In Tibet". This movie is based on the book written by Heinrich Harrer, his experiences in Tibet, during Second World War (between 1944 and 1951). I felt pity for the child Dalai Lama. He was living away from his family and doesn't lead a life of an ordinary child. Brad Pitt, who is playing Heinrich Harrer in the movie becomes a tutor of the Dalai Lama and get chances to be with the child Dalai Lama even in the odd hours. The child Dalai Lama was emotionally down and Heinrich Harrer gives him a gentle hug and that is when the child Dalai Lama breaks down to shed a few tears. I could feel the solace the child Dalai Lama would have received from that simple hug.

Where are we heading- If a simple hug is banned at home, and deprive the children and the future generation, of their way of showing their love for each other? What is the reason for banning a simple hug and a peck? Is our society so unsafe? Are we surrounded by dangerous species in the guise of men? My answer is "YES" for the last two questions. Have we ever read about child molestation by woman of any society? Have we ever read about children being raped, operated and dumped at their backyard, by a woman or women? Are we not living in a civilized world? Are we living in a JUNGLE called EARTH? Who is responsible for this state of affairs? Should we point our fingers at us?

Disturbed and Worried :(
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Victory For Gays, Am Proud Of My Friends

The Delhi High Court today decriminalized Homosexuality. This is good for the entire Gay community in India but bad for the cops who were harassing the community in the name of law.

There was an incidence that happened last year, which made me furious. A gay friend of mine was lured into homosexual act by a man near the Marina Beach in Chennai, one night. This man later identified himself as a policeman by showing his id card, on the same night, after the act. He then blackmailed my friend saying that he would arrest him for his act.Later, the policeman started harassing him now and then. And my friend used to give money to the policeman to either keep his mouth shut or to avoid problems at home. This is just one incident. And there are lot more that are swept under the cover.

I am glad that human rights is restored by striking the IPC 377. Every human being has the right to lead his/ her life in his/ her own way, as long as it doesn't affect a fellow human being. Am going to celebrate this victory with my gay and trans gender friends this weekend. What about you?

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Miss you Mic :-(

"Though you are far apart, You are always in my heart"

I am going to miss you for ever Mic. Music world has lost a brilliant singer, great dancer and the KING OF POP . I am very sad because you left me, when i wanted you to perform in London this month.I am broken because you didn't give me another chance to hear your voice and witness your dance. I am disappointed because you didn't prove your critics wrong. No one else can fill this void. No one else can.

I love you Mic, always.


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Take Me There Please, Will You?

Two days back, David Yang, my friend, asked me what would i wish him to bring me from China. I told him to bring me the replica of "Great Wall of China". Mano, who was coming for a vacation from Egypt, asked me my wish. Guess what? I asked for the Pyramid. Sankar, my friend, asked me what would be my wish list. There are many, many friends who have wondered whether i really have a wish list. Do i look so lifeless? Come on guys, here is my wish list. Let us have fun.

I thought i can just post my wish list here. So that, every friend of mine, can grant my wish, whenever they could. :)

Here it goes:

There is a blue misty place in the sky where there is no trace of living beings except you and me. Imagine the solitary silence and the sound of our breathe. How romantic! Will you take me there?

Take me to the top of the mountain where the water falls originate from. I want to see where does water come from.Did you say that snow melts into water? Then where does Snow originate from? Take me there please. Will you?

Take me to a cave where water drips every moment and leaves a smooth bed of pebbles immersed in water. I want to lie there and feel the cold and smooth stones.Lets enjoy the darkness and the loneliness. Shall we?

I want you to take me, right now, to our dream land. Do you remember the dream that we both had? We walked into the falls and then into a cave. We found a pool right in the middle of the land. The surrounding was neat and calm except the sound of the breeze that came from the bamboo trees. The sound still echos in my mind. The sound that hummed like a mild drum beats.I want to hear the sound again. Take me there please.

Wow, that was a pleasant experience. The evening when you dropped me back home from the beach. Do you remember that? It was raining heavily. And you had to drop me back home soon and get back to work. We didn't have the time to wait for the rain to stop. We both enjoy traveling in the rain and so we decided to keep going. We enjoyed the cold wind as well as the cool rain water running from head to toes.The visibility on the road was poor. Do you remember that we were taken by surprise, when we almost bumped into a bus which was going ahead? That was an exciting ride. I want to go for the ride again. Shall we?

Wish list is not going to end here. But the time demands me to end it now and get back to work. So guys, stay tuned to read more on my wishes, if you really want to know me better.

Wish you all a happy week ahead.

Luv u all
Uma
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Mental Model

This man comes to our house once in every two days. He stands in front of our closed gate. He stands there without making any noise until my mom comes out of our house to place some hot food on his odd shaped plate. Mom does this to every person who comes asking for alms. She don't ever offer cold food to anybody. She is very popular, as a person who offers hot food to whoever comes hungry at our door.I have seen the sweepers, rag pickers, watchmen etc asking for food when they find my mom at the front gate.

Sure, the sight of him standing there wearing the same dirty clothes covering his thin body, dry and unruly hairs, irritated me.He used to come to our home everyday morning and stood there without calling anyone for alms. Only when any of the family member came out to run some errands, do we notice him standing there.He kept standing there for hours together without making any noise. Mom used to give him food everyday morning. We thought that he was deaf and dumb. I once saw him feeding the stray dogs on the street from his plate. I told my mom about this. She said that somebody would have offered him stale food.

House maid has told my mom that she saw him talking to the people in the nearby bus stop. Mom was angry. She thought that this man was ashamed of asking for alms. The next day mom turned him empty handed. She also scolded him for his attitude. We didn't see the man for months together. He appeared suddenly one day morning and was waiting in the front gate. He looked paler than he was earlier. Mom took pity on him and gave him some food. He said, "Mai, do putra hai mera. par ek bhi mujhe dhek bal nahi karta" ("Mom, i have two sons. But no one takes care of me") and started crying. I was moved by his tears. Looking at an old man who sounded helpless at the fag end of his life made me feel very sad.

We then realised that he speaks in different language. And he wouldn't have understood whatever mom has told him the other day. Because we speak Tamil in Tamilnadu, South India and this old man is from North India.He would have made out from my mom's angry face, that she didn't want to give him food anymore. And avoided coming to our home all these months.

Now, whenever he appear in our front gate, we feel pity for him.I don't get angry any more, when i see this man, standing in front of the closed gate.

Luv u all
Uma
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